Yes, I know my last post was about staying positive and keeping up the momentum for yourself, and I am not backing down. However I made an observation last night that was just a bit of a let down for me, within the big positive I am showing.
It all started with my nightly routine of washing my face, my piercing, brushing my teeth and using the mouthwash. I usually do this with not much clothing (sorry for the not so nice mental picture there) so I don't get water all over my top while cleaning my piercing. I stood up and actually looked in the mirror. Or maybe I should say I actually looked and "saw" myself properly. I was happy. My face looks thinner (no matter how round it still is), and I can see a change in my figure. My stomach is smaller, I look smaller around and my curves are a bit more prominent.
That all sounds good, but then I looked at my boobs. While the difference in the size between the two is less (thankfully) I suddenly realized they may be a bit perkier, but they are definitely smaller. Obviously I am losing weight in my boobs along with the rest of my body. However, as some that considers herself, "flat chested for a fat girl." the thought of me losing my pretty little C cups are discouraging. I know, it shouldn't matter, but for some reason it kinda bothered me.
But if that was bothersome, imagine my thought when I pointed out to my husband that the difference in sizes are not as vast as it use to be, his first words were, "Yeah they are smaller, and so is your butt." Excuse me, but I am now losing the junk in my trunk as well? Okay knee, you better heal and heal quick because I need to start walking up a bunch of stairs, doing lunges, and anything else that is going to put my butt muscles to work and make it stay a decent size.
So yes, I am down 30 pounds and happy. I am about to hit my 10% weight loss mark (losing 10% of my starting weight). But, the knowledge of losing things that I have identified as part of who I am, not such a happy moment for me.
Which reminds me, if anyone has any ideas of exercises to increase my butt size and/or how not to lose my boobs, please let me know.
Love, Peace and Still Fat
S
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